Mine Origin: In my image imagined

Am I not that vast of a soul?
Will i not deposit myself into five containers? Carriers of my DNA, manifestations of my blueprint, is it absurd to believe they have the capacity to contain me together, how I'd rather leave my legacy in flesh and blood rather than brick and solid mortar?

Certainly not.
Do I not write about them before their conception? Will they not read about how their father long prepared them doctrine through the awareness of his experience. They will be in awe to realise themselves time travellers every time they read my paragraphs. These were written about you before you were agreed to...my present is a contextual past you probably never would've arrived to. Here where you are lies words I will never speak and writings you will never read. I have them shut up in me, with words within the walls of my heart where no door or window now exists.

I have long fixated upon my reflection. I have long longed to hear my echo. I often wondered why am I propelled to treasure the sorcery of a mind I have. One which has cast spells in cunning words and have given healing to many in a tongue salted with holy writ. I have seed within me. It struck me deeply. I have content I need to offload. Who can carry me? Only one of me can. If i begat you, you will be my witness. You are at this point a thought in my mind-all five of you. Here I present you your purpose, to build upon that which I will leave. Your reflection is my reflection. You are good. You are bad. You are ugly. You are all together lovely. Be true. You are who you are even as I am who I am. I continue my difficult life for your sake. You are hope and cannot fail. These words do seal. You are supposed to exceed me. I have prepared you wisdom. You will refer to me and my experience. Narrate better versions for your offspring. Just be true. This is my living wish for you.

I want all five of you.

One child to tell about what I have seen.
Your eyes are wonderful sources of truth. Even in their deception you have much to know. Astray they may lead you...just remember you are a wander despite the strange beds you may wake up in. The darkness is your greatest ally in this regard- you have light needing of it to be so don't fear it.

One child to tell about what I have heard.
Silence will bother you much because listening has it's perks and wisdom will be a nurtured curse. I have heard many things concerning myself my child, but that which are worth hearing are all we utter in agreement. Hear your glory utter.

One child to tell about what I have touched.
The soft skin of a woman's body. The hair of a black woman well kept. The texture of money notes long kept and unused. There is a touch that may cause you to forfeit all of this. God touches those loved by God, and when you experience that touch, grab the hand and don't let go...you will forever have that print. Touch God again and again and again and when you realise your prints on yourselves, wipe them not off. Life is difficult. Heal thyself.

One child to tell about what I have smelled.
The aura of love has never left me. This scent tends to change when you come across souls unloved...they give off a sensual scent arousing to the body. It is thus you should understand that I lived a most of my youth as a conflicted genius sold out to sensuality struggling to escape the contradictions of his philosophy.

Another child for that which I have tasted.
Your eyes will lighten up. There is great delight in the vortex where we originate. If you die there, you would've lost the plot- so becareful. There is much victory in knowing the heavens exist. Even within defeat, take courage- its really just a construct.

I write for your sake. That you may have something to draw from when you confront your conditioning one day. I have resolved that I have much to live for and my understanding is in you. Be one with your voice, explore the mystic. Critic the rational and rationalise the impossible. Reason to exceed your limitations and learn to love even more than you love to learn.

Polarised consciousness & a generation lost

A "lost generation"...that's what they call us.

They say it like we just sprang up out of nowhere. The truth is we were guided into obscurity, well programmed into an identity of a lifelong conundrum, searching for meaning amidst obscurity. We are criticised for our efforts to ameliorate the circumstances arising from selfish conditioning.

The diagnosis hurts, the diagnosis is true.

They did a good job at teaching us about our painful history & countering indignation by giving us frequent assignments on the 'Rainbow Nation'. This was done deliberately with a significant intention: they understood that our history is filled with so much consciousness,they needed to polarise it.

It was important that we knew what happened but not get worked up by the history lessons. We had to obtain the content- but not the spirit. They constructed an education system which was never meant to enlighten a black mind but to cause distortion and ambiguity in her consciousness. Their aim was to ensure that it would be more convenient for her to live a life devoted to maintaining the status quo rather than opposing it. She was thus taught her history in the same vein & passion (if not less) as when she's being taught about fictional stories- 'snow white', 'goldilocks' etc. This was to ensure that the spirit of her mind remains in check. She will perceive and approach her painful history the same way she would a romantic novel- detached but informed.

The system understood it wont last...but it was a better trade off. By the time she discerns and wakes up from the spell,she must needs go through a process of 'unlearning'. This is a passage of unravelling her context in lieu of her identity, critically confronting her conditioning. This is a process the black life goes through while dealing with the ramifications of the same history she is now consciously aware of (excuse the tautology). She goes through this crisis, aware that her survival is contingent on conformity.

At this stage the system has adapted with dealing with a stimulated consciousness, even participating in helping her express her indignation. She will be availed opportunities to participate in forums, dialogues, commissions, movements, seminars, academia & other 'spaces' created by the system to express herself.

'Good' as it may be deemed, it brings no monumental change.

She is in the oppressors eyes as a child kicking and screaming throwing a tantrum in the middle of a shopping aisle. She is merely a child who needs to be attended to because her tantrums are an inconvenience to the lives of those whom the system is for. The system knows that she will never grow to mobilize radically & consistently in 'mind'. So alone,she agitates at her own risk for individual gain. The system knows that numbers will gather, but the basis and momentum will truly be in anger. Only an elite exercise and demonstrate wisdom and its to the detriment of the collective that this tact is not widespread. This is a well anticipated sequence of events too because all that can be done is criminalised so by all means,it funds the revolution. The law is a systematic tool of sustaining the oppression.

Indeed, this was a checkmate before she started crawling.

We are slaves in complicated chains struggling and fighting to be thrown into the plantations.

Liberate yourself. Atleast take charge of the world inbetween your ears. In your consciousness, shop around for survival friendly ideologies. You can either fight and try overthrow the system or live to duplicate it for your own people.  At the end of it all you truly have one life.

The awakening is already being commercialised. Everything is from the system, by the system, for the system.

SHE is not an exception.